1. You know, I was beginning to think no one read these confessions until I skipped last week. Then I had all kinds of questions- “Where are the Confessions??” “Kearsie, did you disappear?” “Please will you continue doing your Confessions??”
2. …Ok, that might be a bit of a stretch. It was only one person who noticed. And she didn’t ask questions. It was more like “Dude, there’s some Confessions missing from your blog.”
3. So I like to read into things, ok?
4. I don’t own a robe. This is not really interesting at all, but this is what I was thinking of when I fell asleep last night.
5. However, even if I owned a robe, I don’t think I’d ever have time to wear it.
6. My life is so not like the movies. I don’t wake up at 4:30 a.m., shower, walk around in a robe for an hour with perfectly styled hair, slowly sipping on a cup of coffee, having witty banter with my kids at the breakfast table.
7. Nay. My mornings usually are more like repeating one phrase over and over: hurry up!!! we’re gonna be late!!! hurry up!!! we’re gonna be late!!! and then leaving the house with wet hair.
8. So, I think I’m ok with no robe.
9. I’d much rather have a Snuggie. To match Edward.
10. It turns out, most of the folks around me think I’ve taken things a bit too far with my Edward doll. Dude, what is so wrong with sewing a tshirt for Edward doll? I don’t make fun of anyone else’s hobby, unless you collect Dale Earnhart, Jr. plates or something. Then, hey, you’re just asking for it.
11. …if one of you precious readers collects Dale Earnhart, Jr. collectable plates, I promise I will not make fun of you. And I might even let you hold Edward doll.
12. Sometimes, my office chair sinks down. I’m pretty sure this is nature’s way of saying I’ve put on some weight.
13. I gave my girls this tiny Christmas tree that stands about 1 foot tall. They put it in their Barbie Mansion. It needed lights, so I went to Walmart and found a tiny strand that is battery operated. They are super cute. But guess what? I’m pretty sure the light makers soaked the strand in cat pee. The words “it stinks” is clearly understated.
14. I found a tiny Santa coat. That’s all I’m gonna say.
15. My Hubs says after Christmas I am not allowed to sew or knit for a few months. I suppose hearing me constantly complain of the pain in my wrist is a bit annoying.
16. Guess what? When your wrist is in constant pain having to sign 900 gagillion office Christmas cards is SO.MUCH.FUN.
17. By Card # 3 I was like “screw it” and just basically scribbled.
18. That’s ok, they can’t pronounce my name anyways.
19. If anyone is missing some boogers, it’s because they are all in my nose.
20. I have a date on Saturday. So if you see the boogery nose lady all wrapped up in a hat and gloves, that would be me.