Archive for September, 2009

Keyboard Confessions

1.  You’re all scratching your head in confusification.  Today isn’t Friday.  But I like to shake things up.  Also I like to go through bouts of writer’s block and have nothing to write other than lists.  One of those statements is true.

2.  I just read some of the best books ever.  I always say that.  But this time I mean it.  Again.  Anyways.  Hunger Games and Catching Fire by Suzanne Collins.  Seriously.  SO GOOD.

3.  The fact that I can only write in lists now has me worried.  If I wrote my own eulogy, I’m pretty sure it’d be a list. 

4.  I spent $7.00 on zit creme from Mary Kay.  It was $7.00 well spent.

5.  When hosting a birthday party at a barn with 9 little girls, pick the hardest craft in the world for them to do, like making a stick horse.  Seriously, it makes the party so.much.fun. 

6.  Also, only buy one glue gun and make the girls stand in a line for an hour and make them take turns getting stuff glued on.

7.  I might be the best party planner ever.

8.  Or I might be just really really dumb.

9.  I had this dream recently that I wrapped myself in Saran Wrap to make myself sweat.  When I woke up, I really had the urge to do this.

10.  Only 87 days left until Christmas.  I am beginning to panic.

11.  I can only knit so fast, you know.

12.  I am also thinking of making some of these cuties.

Black Apple Rag Dolls as seen on Martha Stewart

Black Apple Rag Dolls as seen on Martha Stewart

13.  But if Shauna has a boy, I might need to learn to make one of these.

Stuffed Robot

Stuffed Robot

14.  In 8 days I’ll be walking the streets of Boulder, Colorado.  Not in a street walker kind of way, just the normal street walking kind of way.  Erm. 

15.  It will be the first time since all my gestating began 9 years ago that The Hubs and I shall be off on our own. 

16.  I plan on bringing Edward doll with me, because he’s always in my handbag.  I wonder what the airport X-ray people will think when they see him…

17.  “Is that an Edward doll?  Security!”

18.  My BFF from high school is coming down in 51 days to see New Moonwith me.  We’re thinking of making T-shirts that say TEAM JACOB JUST FOR NEW MOON

19.  Or I might go ahead and make a T-shirt that says TEAM EWOK

20. Or I might just wear regular clothes.  Whatever.

Happy Friday Tuesday.

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How to make a stick horse

To prepare for party favors for my oldest daughter’s Cow Girl birthday party, I made a stick horse. 

Here were my materials:

Picture 001

 

I used:

* Dowel rod (I used just under an 1 inch dowel rod, so it wouldn’t be flimsy.  You could also saw the handle off a broom.  I don’t have a saw or the motivation to hack away at a broom stick with a knife.  So I went with a dowel rod.)

* Sock (I chose white, because I’m boring that way.  Plus you can draw on white.)

* Polyfill or stuffing

*Red Twine (regular twine could work)

* Red ribbon (for the bridle and reins)

* Googley eyes

* Buttons (for decorations)

* Glue (I will use a glue gun instead of a bottle of glue at the party because HELLO it took forever to dry, even though it is called Quick Dry Glue.  If you’ve got time on your hands, though, this is a cheaper way to go)

* Yarn for hair

* Scissors (To cut stuff, you know.)

 

Ok, so step one:  Stuffing sock with polyfill.  Stuff head, er- foot of the sock, then insert dowel rod and continue stuffing around rod.  Be careful of dowel rod busting through the heel of the sock.  I stuffed to around mid-calf of the sock.  Then I secured the sock to the dowel rod with my red twine.

Picture 005

Step two: Adding eyes and bridle.  I did eyes first.  Because I wanted to place the bridle around the eyes so I needed those placed first.  I cut ribbon and placed it around nose and glued both to sock and the ends of the ribbon.  I cut another length of ribbon and placed above the eyes, what would be the forehead of the horse for top of the bridle.  Once again, glue ribbon to sock and then ends of ribbon.  Now wait an eon for it to dry if you used regular glue like me.  If you’re using a glue gun, you’re super smart but might have burned your fingers.  I’m having sympathy pains for you.

Step three: adding ribbon to make the reins.  Measure enough ribbon to have a set of reins.  Both ends of the ribbon should be glued starting at the nose section of the bridle and to the forehead section of the bridle. I also added some buttons to kind of hide all my glue and cut ends. 

Step four: the hair and mane of horse.  I just looped some yarn around my hands, cut both ends of the loops.  I zig zagged some glue lines along the top and heel of the sock and added the hair.  I also glued some of the hair to come down on the forehead just a bit. 

Aaaannd here’s the finished product.

Picture 007

My daughter plans on adding eyelashes, nostrils and a mouth with markers. 

Happy trails.

Keyboard Confessions

1.  Is it just me or has this week just zoomed right on by?

2.  I am feeling good about myself because I got rid of lots and lots of files on my desk.  All of them with problems. 

3.  It’s sort of like a legal ball of yarn you have to untangle.  It takes patience.  And Diet Coke.

4.  My joy was short lived however, because then a whole nother stack of files just got set on my desk today.  Alas.

5.  Must go get a Diet Coke.

6.  You wanna know my big plans for the weekend?  I shall be attempting adding stripes to my knitted socks. 

7.  I know, you are so wishing you could live my life.  I’m like glamour, class AND craftiness all rolled up into a person.

8.  I am not a big fan of “The Climb” aka The Slime.  However, I do kind of like that song “See You Again“. 

9.  I know, I know.  *rolling my eyes*

10.  At night I’ve been wearing my knitted socks.  They keep my pigs nice and cozy.  Don’t they make me look thin and sexy?

socks

11.  However, since they were the first pair I made, I didn’t know what the slap I was doing.  Therefore, they are too big.  The toes do that floppy thing like  boys they walk around and don’t pull up their socks.  It drives me crazy.

12.  We’re going to see Cloudy With A Chance of Meatballs tonight.  LOVE the book. 

13.  You know what other kids book I love?  Junie B. Jones.  Seriously, so funny.  I’ve been reading them to my girls and I can’t hardly read out loud for the laughing.  Which makes them laugh.  It’s awesome. 

14.  It occurs to me today that I have been wearing the same kind of perfume for 8 years.  This makes me feel predictable.

15.  I’ll bet you’re just DYING to know what perfume it is.  I’ll tell you what it’s not- it’s not Febreeze.

16.  I’ve been burning my pumpkin scented candle at home.  That thing I said before about pumpkin scented things?  It’s so not true.  Just sayin. 

17.  Also, I’m not going to say what I said before.  You’ll just have to wonder.

18.  Sorry Lance, I know you’re facepalming. 

19.  Ooh!  I forgot about this thingI’ll be making this weekend for Emma’s Cowgirl Birthday Partay.  If you beg, I shall post a pic.  Because I’m nice that way.  And a bit narcissistic. 

20.  I’ve decided this is my favorite song ever. 

Happy Friday, my friends.

Adventures with Edward: Edward writes Bella Doll a poem

Setting: Office of the human

 

Edward, climbs out of the human’s giant purse and says he’s been thinking.  I ask him what about.  “Bella Doll,” he says, with a faraway look.  “I’ve decided to woo her.  Tis time I declared my intentions.”

I set Edward up at my desk and let him brainstorm.  After a few minutes I check on his progress. 

Picture 002

 

“Hmm,” I say.  “It’s ok, but I think you can do better, Edward.  Try again.  This time, think about what you like about Bella Doll.”

Picture 003

 

“Ha.Ha.”  I say, rolling my eyes.”  Edward laughs uproariously.  Boys.

I place Edward off to the side of the computer to think about maybe writing a poem.  Edward contemplates.

Picture 006

Poor Edward.  He can’t scratch his head.  Those elbows just won’t bend enough.

Edward types away at the computer.  He tsks.  Crosses things out.  Thinks more.  Types again.  This is what he comes up with:

125311511363784

 

Edward looks to me for approval.  “Well?” he asks.

“Umm…Gee, Edward, I’m just so blinded by the love oozing from your words…give me a second to think…”

Edward taps his foot impatiently.  It’s the only thing on his body that moves with ease.  I pick out the drum line for “Whip It” in his foot taps.

“Edward, I think we should just try to find you some sunglasses.”

Edward sighs deeply and crawls back in my bag.  Poor Edward.

Keyboard Confessions

I figure all over the innernets today there will be talk of the tragedy of 9/11.  While I do not want to appear cold to this spot in history, I decided to just go ahead and do my usual inane Keyboard Confessions.  Because I can.  Thank you to all the soldiers who make it possible for me to go about with business. 

1.  Today I feel super old.  Here’s my list of why.

2.  I’ve got the arthritis.  And my blood pressure is high. 

3.  Nowadays, when the option to have ice cream is present, I must stop and think “will I be near a bathroom afterwards? hmm…”

4.  When I’m watching TV, I have to put my glasses on now.

5.  Then I ask Hubs to turn up the volume.

6.  When we’re listening to music, I ask Hubs to turn down the volume.

7.  I sit around and knit.  For fun.  I even knit in church.  I’m one of *those* people.

8.  When I sit around and knit at home, I have a lap blanket on my legs.

9.  I do crosswords for fun, too. 

10.  Weird things give me heartburn now. Or gas.

11.  When Hubs goes to order something spicy, I give him that look and say “you know you’ll pay for that later, right?”

12.  Maybe Hubs is getting old too, because the last time we did this, he looked thoughtful for a moment and said, “you’re right” and ordered something else.

13.  That song “Ring of Fire” reminds me of hemorrhoids.

14.  I can’t remember when my feet and hands looked slim and pretty before arthritis took over.

15.  Nor can I remember what my belly looked like before having babies.

16.  I complain about how expensive postage costs now.

17.  Seriously, 44 cents?  It’s highway robbery.

18.  Over the years, I’ve morphed into The Weird Lady Who Knits Everyone’s Christmas Gifts.

19.  Sorry, family members and friends who are reading this.  I know what you’re thinking.  “Aww, crap.”

20.  I eat Fiber One Granola bars.  Everyday. Regularly.  To stay regular.  Erm.

Happy Friday.

I got a pain.

I am not a sporty person.  My eyes glaze over when I hear that ESPN Sports Center ditty.  But it seems to me that athletes get hurt all the time, no matter what sport they play.

Tennis Elbow

Golfer’s Knee

Swimmer’s Ear

Broken ankles from gymnastics

Not to mention jammed fingers and thumbs from basketball and football

 

Sports work your body.  However, it’s not just sports that work your body.  Arts and crafts do as well.  Yes huh, they do too.  I’ll prove it.

Exhibit A:

Picture 001

 

This is my thumb, all corroded looking from holding knitting needles every spare second in my day.  Plus I wash my hands every few minutes to avoid The Swine so they are drier than um, really dry stuff.  Gross, I know.  I never claimed to be a hand model.

Exhibit B:

knuckle

 

That, my friends, is what I refer to as “Knitter’s Knuckle”.  It is where the yarn rubs over the first knuckle of my finger.  It’s sore.  I know because I keep pressing it to see if it hurts.  It’s a weird compulsion.  I must press it. 

 

So knitting is now in league with basketball and it’s many injuries.  At least I won’t lose any teeth like in hockey.

The Giveaway Weiner!

The Random Number Generator has spoken and the winner of the Scrapbook Album and Set of Cards goes to…

*Drum roll*

#19! 

Misty, step right up, you’ve been selected as this giveaway’s winner!

Misty and me go way back, we were even roomies in college.  So I know she’ll love these!

 

 

Thanks again to Rhonda and Amie from A and R Design Studio for donating these awesome handcrafted items!