Setting: Carpeted wilderness with just a smidge of civilization
Edward, standing alone attempts to run his fingers through his unruly hair.
He can’t…quite…reach…beennnnddd elllboowwwww….
He sees a strange sight-
It is…himself. Edward stands, head cocked to the side, looking at this carbon copy.
“Hmpf,” he says. He turns away from the imposter and that’s when he sees her. Bella.
“Bella”, he says, experimentally using her name. “Bellaaaa.” It is like the blood of a gazelle on his tongue.
He comes closer to have a better look. He realizes, this is it, this is the adventure he’s been hunting for.
He beckons to her to come out.
Bella, staring straight ahead says something about “integrity of the packaging” and doesn’t move.
“Besides,” she says. “This Edward has something you’ll never have.”
“What’s that?” Edward asks.
Edward takes a closer look at the other Edward.
Edward, one last time looking at the pair of them realizes that they are almost holding hands.
Clearly, Edward cannot compete with the other Edward for the plastic heart of Bella.
Resolutely, Edward turns away and continues attempting to run his hands through his hair.