Famousosity, sort of…again

I submitted this post to HumorPress.com and they selected me as a semi-finalist!  I feel semi-proud.  When I read that post again, I semi-laughed.  This day is semi-over and I am drinking a beverage that is semi-full. 


Sigh.  The humor escapes me today as it is precisely 900 bagillion degrees outside and the cashier at Goodwill just schooled me.  Indirectly.  At least I think she did as none of the cashiers at Goodwill ever directly speak to me other than to tell me what I owe.  Yet they carry on conversations behind the counter that I think refer to me. 

Let me explain.


Lunch hour.  45 minutes to kill after downing cheeseburger containing 850 squillion calories.  I go to the Goodwill to hunt for wool sweaters I can torture and maim into felted wool crafts.  My venture proves fruitful and I take my goods to the counter. 

Cashier #1 rings up my goods and removes wire hangers that have poked me and pulled at my clothing during my tour of the sweater aisle.  She gives me the total.  I set my purse and to-go soda on the counter to count out change. 

Cashier #1: (speaking to Cashier #2)  I guess I need to fix that sign on the door.

Cashier #2:  What sign?

Cashier #1:  The one that says no food or drink inside the store.  (She gives me evil eye.)  I suppose people don’t see it or they are ignoring it.

Cashier #2:  Hmpf.

Me:  (smiling brightly) Have a good day! (I leave store and return to my car which is practically melted from the heat.)

Exit scene. 


Ok, so maybe there was a sign on the door saying NO FOOD OR DRINK INSIDE STORE.  Maybe I broke that sacred rule by carrying in my covered beverage inside the holy grounds of The Goodwill filled with People’s Used Clothing and Junk that Smells Suspiciously Like Urine in the Book Room. 

However.  I am a responsible adult.  I did not splash about my Diet Coke and spray the clothing with my straw.  I did not tip over my beverage creating a Possible Accident Waiting to Happen Puddle next to the Broken Down Shoes.  I did not make a mess. 


*** Editor’s note:  As I just typed “Geez”, I took a drink of my semi-filled soda and accidentally dripped onto my shirt.  Hmm, maybe Goodwill has a point.


14 responses to this post.

  1. Hehehe, I like to think I’m a responsible adult, but it’s hard to convince others when I almost always have drink down my top.

    Super congratulations on the blog rockage. 🙂


  2. i would have just said –

    yeah. you do need to fix the sign. otherwise. people will just bring whatever they want in here. the nerve.

    then. i would have passed gas and left.


    • Posted by soundsliketomatoes on June 22, 2009 at 8:12 pm

      You’re right. I should’ve just added to the eau de urine smell with a little after cheeseburger gas.


      • or. i would have said –

        oh no you di’nt just say that. i brought this coke in here for you because you look nastay hot. but now that you wanna school me and be all sarcastic *slurp* *slurp* *open lid and pick out ice* *chew ice* *walk out*.

  3. My spleen hurts after reading this post.


  4. Ooh, that would make me mad – and at Goodwill! I once took a fresh coffee into a store with one of those signs and politely asked if I could set it on the counter while I looked around and she was SO NASTY I’ve never shopped there again. The coffee caught my eye before the store. What are you going to do?

    Can’t wait to see what you make from felt!!!


    • Posted by soundsliketomatoes on June 22, 2009 at 8:33 pm

      Well, I shall make some coffee cozies and some felted coasters and some keychains and perhaps some flower magnets. Or a coin purse. Also, I’m really wanting to try to make some fabric yo-yos. I dreamed of them after I dreamed of killer ostriches.


  5. Yay for you!!!! 🙂 By the way, I feel like people that work at the Goodwill should not be allowed to be rude to people who come in to shop. These shoppers provide their paycheck. I mean…I’m just sayin.

    Also, I spill something on my shirt EVERY single day. Today…twice…green beans exploded on me. TWICE.


  6. Posted by lynnfromforloveorfunny on June 23, 2009 at 12:11 am

    You go, girl! I love the Humorpress post. I hope it does extremely well.

    Wanna lid for that soda?


  7. Kearsie, first off, thanks for commenting back on my blog. I appreciate it. I loved your comment and how you nicknamed me during your first visit. Awesome.

    I’m just catching up on a few of your posts, as I was away for a few days.

    I loved the Goodwill story. LOL. Getting schooled by the Goodwill employees. Classic! I think you kept your cool better than most people would have!


  8. Our thrift store workers always get an attitude about things too! And I think, “Do you REALIZE where you’re working?”


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