Today’s observation

So today was another thrilling day in Child Support Court.  I accompany the boss under the guise that I’m here to help him.  Secretly I think he just wants all the other lawyers to say, dude, he brought his secretary?  He must be really good.  Whatevah, it keeps the day interesting so I shan’t complain.

Today, I sat doodling on my legal pad when another attorney sat down and began scribbling furiously on his legal pad.  I tried to surrepitiously glance and see if it was anything worth noticing, but his chicken scratch was in code or something.  I went back to writing FLOWER POWER on my legal pad surrounded by flowers.  I was born in the wrong era, I think. 

Then I heard it.

He was a heavy nose breather.

Do you know what I’m talking about?  It was so loud that I had to keep myself from looking right at him to see if he had just jogged a mile and was visibly sweaty.  I also couldn’t help but wonder if he as a snorer.  I wondered if other people nearby could hear him and think it was me heavily nose breathing.  At least he wasn’t breathing out of his mouth, that annoys the stew out of me.  Also why I carry gum with me all the time, I will so offer you a piece.

I got to looking around the room, people watching to pass the time.

I saw lots of hand talking, from people who can’t say a word without gesturing with their hands.  I so wanted to know what they were saying, especially if they were really waving those hands around.  I saw lots of head nodding, from people who respond always by nodding their head.  These are folks who I’m sure nod even while on the phone and the other party can’t see the nod.  I saw lots of hair fiddling, twisting, flipping and finger combing.  No telling how many stray strands of hair were floating around.  There were the crossed leg folks who bounced their foot in the air.  This look is the epitome of boredom.  Lots of folks had their cell phones and were texting about their exciting life in Court.  I had trouble seeing their face as they were looking solely at their phones.  Most of the folks in this latter category were the attorneys.  And then there were the gum chewers.  Future TMJ afflicted gum chewers.

It got me thinking…

What kinds of phsycial tics do I have?  I think I fall in the category of the hair twister.  I also must smooth my fingernails if I have nothing to hold in my hands.  If I’ve got a pen, I will click and unclick 90 bagilliontimes, or twirl it on my fingertips like a drummer twirls a drumstick.  It’s just one of the few things I do that makes me super cool.  At least I don’t publicly pick my nose, trying to disguise it with a scratch.  Psh, we so know you’re digging for nostril treasures. 

What kinds of little habits like this do you have?

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11 responses to this post.

  1. Posted by Jaime on March 3, 2009 at 8:33 pm

    I chew the inside of my lip. I watch people. I shake my feet.
    I was chewing my lip as I read this post. If I were in your place (in court) I’d be observing everyone too, to try to guess what their lives are like and wondering how I could help. I observe a lot.

    Reply

    • Posted by soundsliketomatoes on March 3, 2009 at 8:38 pm

      I chew my lip too! I totally forgot all about that. I wonder is that a nervous trait?

      Reply

  2. OK I just have to say your pen clicking would drive me totally insane. I would probably take the pen away from you and throw it against the wall. Then you could smooth your nails all day. That wouldn’t bother me.

    When my hair is long enough, I pick at the split ends. Can do that for HOURS. Have a tiny pile of broken off hair on the table when I am done. Isn’t that hot?

    I am too big a germaphobe to pick my nose…but kinda sounds like fun…

    Reply

    • Posted by soundsliketomatoes on March 3, 2009 at 8:55 pm

      It drives Lance crazy when I smooth my nails and then click them. click. click. click. He kind of explodes. It’s just that all those years of smoothing my nails has made them super hard, so the clicking is kind of fun.

      I used to pick at other people’s split ends. I drove one girl, Amy, crazy. It’s her fault for having so many split ends, I say.

      Reply

  3. I am a hair twirler. Well, no twirling, just adjusting the bangs or touching my hair. I am also the nodder. I am also the one who gets caught people watching and has to look away real quick. I am the one who tries to hide in an empty store aisle and fix a wedgie. Ugh. I am a wreck. I also bite the inside of my cheek. And I pick my nails. No biting, but picking. And I used to twirl my wedding ring around, but now it’s so tight it doesn’t really move much.

    Reply

  4. Posted by Robin on March 4, 2009 at 12:58 am

    i will spare you the embarrassment of telling everyone about some nose picking instances that i have seen you in girl…….but you know what i am talking about…….i will not drop clues here. contact me in secret….

    i am hair twirler. i am constantly playing with my hair. i think that’s it why i have to wash it so much. does HAVING to have subtitles on when i watch a movie count??? i am also a nose picker. i try to play it off, but i am sure all of my friends snicker at me behind their backs cause i’m sure they have seen me dig for gold a few times. i also rub the sides of my feet against my sheets for awhile before i fall asleep. i don’t know how this started, but i do it every night without even realizing it.

    death to gum smackers! chew….don’t smack people.

    hey do you remember jon goins friend justin who would stick his index fingers up in the air everytime he would talk??? he was funny!

    Reply

  5. sometimes. when i get really nervous. i stick my fingers under my arms. and i smell them like this….

    Reply

  6. Posted by Alice Wiggins on March 4, 2009 at 2:11 pm

    Wendiwinn is just wrong… I LOVE to people watch. I sit at the mall or anywhere else and just watch people and make up stories about their lives or critique (read criticize) their choice of wardrobe, I decide whether or not couples match (you know some do, like you & Lance, and others so don’t), I decide whether he’s on a second (or maybe 3rd) wife, I TRY to decide if they are grandparents or parents (really hard to tell these days and this also falls into the category of 2nd or 3rd wife). And put Andy & I together doing this and we fall down laughing. But seriously, have you ever seen a person and think to yourself “did she bother to LOOK in the mirror before she left home?”

    As far as ticks: I pick at my cuticles, I mess with my watch, I try not to do the clicking nails or pen thing because everyone seems to get very angrey for some reason, I have been known to pick at my nose & mess w/ my hair. I mostly try not to look as bored (or aggravated) as I feel in work meetings I have to attend.

    Well, another letter. Sorry!

    Reply

  7. Posted by soundsliketomatoes on March 4, 2009 at 2:28 pm

    Shauna, I have been known to pick a wedgie in public. I figure comfort trumps dignity. We shall have lunch one day, chatting away and twirling our tresses over fajitas.

    Robin, what was that secret code we made up for prom to tell each other when there was booger issues? Something like picking corn or bats in the bat cave. haahahahaah Yes, I’ve been known to pick. I usally try to play it off like Seinfield “it was an itch, not a pick!” Ahem.

    Winn, are you that girl in Superstar? Also, should I send you some antiperspirant? My Dove works pretty well. Also, maybe this explains the meat gloves thing.

    Alice, I love your letters. Never apologize for the letters. I fear I am one of those people who get dressed in the morning without looking in the mirror. Often why when I do look in the mirror there are clingons in the nose, hair tacos in the hair and visible panty lines. Sigh. I’m a lost cause, I fear. Also, it would be such a treat to hang out with you and Andy and people watch.

    Reply

  8. I hold the ends of my hair up to my mouth like a mustache. It’s so weird and I’m completely unaware when I’m doing it, I think it’s a throwback from when I was little and used to suck on my hair. (I know, I’m WEIRD)

    Reply

    • Posted by soundsliketomatoes on March 4, 2009 at 4:08 pm

      You know, I used to chew on my hair when I was a kid. I also ate paper. I did that until I read that there are microscopic worms in paper. Then I moved on to Reese’s Cups. I also put my hair strands up on my upper lip like a mustache. I didn’t realize it until you mentioned it! We are weird.

      Reply

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