Diagnosing my purse

“So, Kearsie, did reading two of those Cake Wreck posts have you in stitches?  *Chuckle* I must say the one about E.T. had me about to pee my britches.”

“Erm.  Yes, I did read them and they were funny.  Thanks for the recommendation.”

“How is your funny bone sprain?  Do you feel the funny today?”

“Well, more a rant.  I slipped in the shower and suddenly felt the need to rant about how slippery my shower is.  It’s getting dangerous to be in there.  Nothing like feeling like you’re standing on snot as you’re getting clean…no, see that’s not fun to talk about.”

“Hmm.  I see your point.  Ahem.  I’ve been going through your history and it appears that this sprain is a reoccurring injury.  I saw it here and here.”

“Yes.  Sigh.  The malady strikes me occasionally.  I try to do a Lee and just press on.  Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn’t.”

“Well, do you have any good post ideas for today?  Surely someone had a suggestion for you.”

“Actually, my buddy at The Retirement Chronicles has tagged me for a Bag Tag or something.  I’m supposed to take a picture of my bag and reveal the contents of it.  What do you think?  Shall I do it?”

“Sure!  No time like the present.  Let’s see what you’ve got.”

“Well, here’s my camera.  Why don’t you take a picture of the bag and I’ll sort the contents.”

“Ok.  Should I just point and click this little button -OW!  That flash is bright!”

“Erm, sorry.  Yes, just hold it like that and I’ll step out of the way.”

*Click*  “Done.  Now let’s open up this bad boy and see what’s inside!”

“Doctor, why are you rubbing your hands together like a mad scientist?  You’re scaring me.”

“Sorry.  My wife never lets me inside her purse.  I’ve always been curious.  Where did you find this little beauty?”

“Walmart.  $12.00.  It was a bargain.  As you can see, the faux leather has that glossy shine that shouts, “I’m cheap!” But, it holds all my junk, so I shan’t complain.”

“Well, let’s dig in and see what we’ve got!”

“Well, as you can see, it’s mostly junk.  I’ve got two pens with blue ink, a checkbook, my cell phone, my camera, my camera cord, an iPod Shuffle, the docking thingy to charge it, two bottles of Bath and Body Works Hand Sanitizers, a bottle of lotion that smells like cake, sunglasses, a cool polka dot wallet, a mycokerewards.com cardboard thingy I tore from our fridge pack of Diet Coke with my code, a thank you card I keep forgetting to send, a set of car keys for each car, another set of keys to get into work because I enjoy torturing myself in efforts to unlock the door and sift through the junk in my purse hunting them down, Blistex, a couple of band-aids, a *cough*lady’s item*cough*, and a ball of yarn with two knitting needles poking out.  That’s it.”

“Wow!  That’s a whole lot of items in your bag!  I’ve only got chapstick and my wallet in my bag-erm, I mean, erm, if I carried a bag that’s what I would have in my bag.  Ahem.”

“…”

“Ok, you ever heard of a man-bagor a murse?”

“…”

“Erm, come back and see me if you can’t find your funny.”

 

Ok, Retired and Awarded One, here is a picture of my sad bag from Walmart.

My sad little purse.  Actually I really like it.
My sad little purse. Actually I really like it.

Anyone who wants to do this, feel free!  All the nosey interested people like me will love it!

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5 responses to this post.

  1. I am totally going to do this, although the contents of my purse are probably boring in comparison.

    Reply

  2. How come you didn’t take a picture of the doc’s murse?

    OH SNOT! I am taking this all too literal, aren’t I??

    But literally, you’re fun-nay…

    Reply

  3. It’s cute! You never fail to make me giggle, dear woman!

    Reply

  4. Posted by Alice Wiggins on February 20, 2009 at 1:18 pm

    My bag: a wallet w/ very little money in it; a checkbook w/ very little money in it; a purse calendar because I’m getting old & can’t remember anything; 4 different lipsticks which I rarely remember to use after eating lunch or chewing off my lipstick; gum (couldn’t live w/o the gum); 3 pens because I can’t ever seem to find one when I need it; my cell phone, of course; sunglasses because the sun is killer here in FL; various receipts because I can still find things in my purse so it’s not yet time to clean them out; cheater glasses because my contacts (mono-vision) can’t see the little print in dark restaurants; printed out receipts of bills I’ve paid while at work, well, because; various business cards & appt reminders and some of those “buy 10 and get 1 free cards that I never seem to remember to use when I’m in the store/restaurant (see calendar note above); Oh wait, there’s a little money stuck in the side pocket. What a great day! And some Aleve for when using the cheaters isn’t working well enough or one of my aggravating co-workers REALLY aggravates me! Love your purse, btw. I think it’s cute!

    Reply

  5. I like your cheapy purse….hey, it’s a step up from my Big Lots purse and a LOT cuter!
    Loved your list too. You are so funny!!

    Reply

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