How to say my name without making me go crazy

When my mother selected “Kearsie” as my name, I think she was on crack. 

Just kidding, but dang.  Can’t a girl catch a break?

I have one of those names that no one can pronounce.  Or spell.  Or find on a mug or a key chain or a magnet.  Nope.  My name is one of those bizarre unique names that make Southerners and children pause in puzzlement.  Also old people. 

My name is Kearsie.  It’s like kah -EAR-see.  Kearsie.  See?  Not too hard. 

As you can plainly see, there is no “T”.  It is not “Kearstie”.  This is not to be confused with names such as Kirstie Alley or Kirsten Dunst.  Similar, yes, but as similar as bologna and roast beef.  Meaning, not really similar at all. 

This morning, a woman came in to drop by some documents for me to work on.  She addressed me as “Kearstie”.  I politely corrected her, “It’s Kearsie.”  She nodded, called me Kearstie again and went on with what she was saying.  It wouldn’t have been so bad if she hadn’t said my name like 47 times.  The first 45 I could handle, even though I was getting a twitch.  But by #47, I was ready to stab her with my blue pen. 

Yes, just wee bit of a violent reaction.  I realize this. 

Sigh.

I have been called many many things growing up. 

Kerosene.

Queersie.

Kersty.

Christy.

Karissa

Hey, you.

Yeah, you with the name I can’t pronounce.

I have complained before about my name.  Immediately friends or whoever I’m ranting to will say, Oh no!  I love your name!  But I have also noticed that nary a one has considered “Kearsie” for their children’s names.  Interesting, no?

 

Ok, so this is really nothing more than a mindless rant to fill my blog update quota of the week.  But aren’t you proud I didn’t say “vaginal” once? 

Oops.

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20 responses to this post.

  1. Google your first name. Unique is GOOD!

    Reply

  2. Posted by Jaime Williamson on January 29, 2009 at 6:33 pm

    HA! People might SAY my name right…but spelling is a different story. Jamie (which is most of the time), Jamy, Jaimie, Jaimy, Jame, Jamey…oh my goodness, I’m getting irritated spelling my name wrong. I have had it pronounced wrong plenty of times, but I think spelling it wrong is as annoying as it being spoken wrong! So glad you posted! Don’t wait so long!!!

    Reply

  3. Posted by Aunt Shanon on January 29, 2009 at 7:00 pm

    I love your name and always have. It’s Finnish. It means Little Cherry. Aunt Julie is the one who suggested it to your mom. My name is spelled differently, so I am either called Sharon or Janet. Or else they spell it Shannon. So I do feel your pain.

    Reply

  4. I hear you. My parents made UP my middle name out of an Aunt’s name and an Uncle’s name. Then, to add insult to injury they shortened it and called me by a nickname (made up from part of the made-up middle name.)
    The nickname?: NESSIE. Yep, you read it right…the same name as the Loch Ness Monster…but I was called it first (before they nicknamed the Loch Ness monster Nessie in the 60’s). Whenever the phone rings at home and someone asks for “Nessie”, my husband knows it is some long-lost relative, because they are the only ones who still call me by that name.
    I have had to spell my middle name (which I won’t list here) every time I have to give someone my middle name for a form or whatever.
    I feel your pain!!!!

    Reply

  5. I just added you to my blogroll after reading about 10 posts. You are hilarious and I’m so excited to have found another blog to love.

    Reply

  6. Posted by soundsliketomatoes on January 29, 2009 at 7:26 pm

    I went to lunch with my husband today and pulled up my post on his iPhone aka The Mistress. Because of his linguistics education through seminary, he made fun of the way I spelled my name phonetically. Kah-EAR-see. Apparently, *I* can’t even say my name correctly.
    Sigh.

    Reply

  7. My mom named me after anesthesia. Something about labor pains.

    Hugs and Mocha,
    Stesha

    Reply

  8. Sorry, yeah, I was gonna say what Lance said. I sat here for about 3 minutes saying, “Kah- EAR- sie?” “Kah-EAR-sie?” Josh was looking at me funny!

    KEARsie…two syllables…emphasis on the first part…

    Are you gonna stab me in the eye with your blue pen (running to my corner)?

    Reply

  9. listen, karissa. i think your name is beautiful. i wouldn’t change it to kearsie. that might be even harder to pronounce.

    good luck.

    and much love.

    Reply

  10. *gasp* Retired One — I join you in Nessiedom. I am called that as well sometimes, but it’s because my name is Vanessa. A beautiful name that is often used for characters in books or movies that are usually evil or sluts or both.

    Reply

  11. Posted by javajune on January 29, 2009 at 11:26 pm

    I love unusual names but I can imagine that it gets old really fast. As for the woman with the donuts- she must be slow! It’s amazing how much a name affects our life and the way people see us.
    jj- http://javajune.wordpress.com/

    Reply

  12. Posted by Kamryn on January 30, 2009 at 1:17 am

    Stesha’s and Wendi’s comments made me laugh out loud. I still have my Kamara Cabbage Patch doll. For those who don’t know, Kears and I had dolls named Kamara and Karissa since that’s what the doctor always called us. Apparently, my name is all the rage right now, what with people thinking up unique names and weird ways to spell them.

    At least no one calls you Kiki anymore.

    Reply

  13. Posted by freebutterfly on January 30, 2009 at 4:40 am

    Dude. It’s okay. My girls call their aunt Kiki.

    Did you see that movie with John Cusack and Catherine Zeta Jones? “Kiki? Kikikins?” That be why.

    Reply

  14. Posted by Your Cousin on January 30, 2009 at 6:55 pm

    I used to do the same thing, as you know my name is similar. Honestly, I gave up. Now when I place phone orders, reservations, etc, I say Trina. It’s easier than explaining. For those ephemeral people in my life, I just don’t sweat it. Who cares what they think about me, or my name! Friends and coworkers don’t get a pass though, unless it’s when they try spelling it.

    Reply

  15. I can relate, only mostly with my last name (Votipka). It’s phonetic but everyone adds letters or just looks at me weird.
    I had a professor last quarter (I’m a grad student) who had SO much trouble with names. We had a student named Ziji (like the sound of letters Z G) and he called him ZIGGY. I had another classmate named Malik whom he called Malcolm! Bizarre!

    Reply

  16. Posted by Morgan on January 31, 2009 at 9:05 am

    OK, Kears….. always loved your name! And even though, no, I did not name my child after you, it still tickles me that you lived up to said promise made many, many years ago and had my namesake.
    And as for the magnets, keychains, & little miniature license plates … as a kid, I always had to get ones of my middle name. Nobody named their daughter “Morgan” in the 70’s!! I had to get to be an adult before that started happening! So now, much to my daughter’s embarrassment, when I come across one of those rotating displays of personalized trinkets, I’m all like “Ooh Ooh Look! They’ve got my name!!” LOL

    Reply

  17. Look, the whole thing started because your biological contributor insisted we keep up the family tradition (on HIS side, of course) of not naming our kids the same as everybody else. Your Grandfather Lorenze Ursis Carlose Kaufman -LUCKY for short but I don’t know just HOW lucky he was as he went thru 3 wives & had a gazillion kids)- anyway, he use to say when he called his kids in for supper he didn’t want the whole neighborhood to come running. So that’s where it all started, K-EAR-see. And have you forgotten the teacher who called you “PEARSIE” for the entire YEAR? Yes, you were known as “Pearsie Kaussman”When she sent her first parent -teacher correspondence home to me, I thought she was referring to an imaginary friend of yours, or possibly your alter ego. Imagine that, a TEACHER who not only couldn’t pronounce your name right after an year but apparently could not read it either.But you should still be grateful you wern’t named “Sigrid” after your bio-dude ‘cos nobody could pronounce his name either! :0

    Reply

  18. I always get called lettuce. I don’t get it. It’s simple: RO – mine. Just like it looks. Nothin’ fancy or new-fangled: Not Romaine, or Ramen, or Rowminnie. What are people thinking? You know what else really gets me fired up??? When my co-workers (with whom I’ve worked for two years and correct them with regularity) call me MRS. Romine. Dude, don’t do that in ear-shot of a potential murse carrying, future Mr. to my Mrs. It just irritates me. Make a little effort, people!!!!

    Reply

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