I don’t experience Buyer’s Remorse too often. I’m not a “shopper”. I’m not suckered in by the flashy advertising of new products, although that new Swiffer product has me wondering if my dusting needs are being met. But as a rule, I usually stick with products I know and love. My grocery list week to week stays roughly the same. And due to being anal and a penny pincher, I usually mark on my list what I think I’ll spend. It’s just one of those things I do, like sitting down to the supper table and putting my napkin in my lap immediately, like I can’t sit there at the table without that protective layer of pulped paper on my lap. Just one of those quirky things.
So today when I was at Walmart with the other ladies at my work, hunting for seasonal decorations; plastic pumpkins, cheap scarecrows made out of canvas and straw, potpourri to make the office stink pretty, I found myself in line with my deli lunch, stomach grumbling in serious mutiny. I was hungry. And the line was really long. And I found myself looking around, just taking in the sights. And I found a prize of chocolate cake and white goo, aka The Oreo Cakester, all for just $.88. So I snatched that bad boy up and paid the cashier for my goods.
Now, sometime after eating my hot deli meal, I broke into the package of Cakesters and bit into it. And it was…
(you’re dying to know, aren’t you? I’ve got you by the eyeballs, just viciously holding out on you, making you wonder… I’m so mean.)
…yucky. I was very sad to have parted with three quarters, a dime and three pennies, plus tax. While it lightened the metallic load in my coin purse, I miss those sweet coins. I should have counted to ten. I should have bought a PB Twix. I should have let my hungry eyes gloss right over that shiny blue wrapper and move on to the perfect stacks of gum. I should have read the packaging on the travel Oust. I should have read about Jennifer Aniston’s possible voyage into liposuction.
But I didn’t. I broke the cardinal rule of the shopper- NEVER buy anything that immediately surrounds the cashier, lest you instantly or eventually regret said decision.
Durn you, Oreo Cakester, for being a cake tease.