ADDIE: Momma
ME: Yes, Addie?
ADDIE: When I turn six, will you get me a bra?
ME: Erm, why?
ADDIE: Because I need a bra when I’m six.
ME: Erm, well….see, you don’t really need a bra yet. You won’t need to wear a bra for a long time.
ADDIE: Yes, huh!
EMMA: Addie. You do not need a bra!
ADDIE: YES I [...]
Archive for April, 2009
30 Apr
A glimpse into my life as my children’s chauffeur
29 Apr
You totally don’t have to floss everyday to have great teeth
At least, that’s what the nice dental hygienist told me this week. Sort of. Mostly.
I, the model patient, had not been to see the dentist in 12 years, not counting that one time in college when my teeth were killing me and had them checked out for like, 20 seconds by a dentist wearing no shoes. I [...]
29 Apr
Take On Me, the literal version
I was an MTV child. I grew up watching music videos most of my childhood. One of my all time favorites was Take On Me by a-ha. Extremely cool video for a one hit wonder.
Mostly videos don’t match the lyrics. But what if they did?
Here is Take On Me, the literal version:
[...]
27 Apr
What did he say? Is that English?
I fear all my years of listening to Bass in the back of cars sitting next to giant speakers has finally taken it’s toll on my ears.
Friday, in my Keyboard Confessions, I stated that it is impossible to be in a bad mood listening to Come On, Eileen by Dexy’s Midnight Runners. For real. Find [...]
24 Apr
Keyboard Confessions
1. This last time I went to get my hair cut, I got a wild hair (hahaha pun) and busted out with “Go ahead and give me some bangs!” What I was really trying to say was “Please make it so my hair is in my face all my waking hours!”
2. I should have read [...]
22 Apr
Remember this? *We are the World installment*
Remember watching MTV when MTV still had music videos? I miss Kurt Loder. And Martha Quinn. But not Down Town Julie Brown.
This was a music video with just about everyone popular in the year 1985. If you’ve never seen it, you must have been living under a rock. Or [...]
17 Apr
Keyboard Confessions
1. Sometimes, if I’m not paying attention and I cough or sneeze, I pee a little.
2. I found this out the hard way. Also, I was at work.
3. Yesterday, I was eating trail mix and a raisin fell into my bra. I was faced with two dilemmas: how to get it out discreetly and should [...]
16 Apr
Open letter to the birds using my car as a toilet
Dear Birds of the Parking Lot,
Please stop pooping on my car. It’s gross. And rude. I don’t poop on your tree branches. And I’ll bet my poop has way less germs and bacteria and cooties than your poop. Stop it.
Also, please stop flying into our building and messing up our basement as I’m the only woman brave [...]
21 Apr
Spammers, you tease me so
Posted by soundsliketomatoes in Bizarre stuff, My life. Tagged: comments, Spam. 11 Comments
On this here blog, WordPress lets me know when they have detected a Spam masquerading as a comment. I get about 10 a week. It’s like blog junk mail. And I don’t even have the option of winning a trip to Aruba, all expenses paid.
Sometimes these spam comments they are something like, !@#%@#@!^&#y^&u&&&^$## and so you [...]
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